St. Augustine Pt 5

Day Five: Holy Matrimony, Flying Rings & the Haunted Holiday Inn

October 17, 2026 | St. Augustine, Florida

There's something truly beautiful about a wedding day. The excitement, the anticipation, the beautiful decorations, and the promise of two people beginning the rest of their lives together. As the officiant, I always consider it an incredible honor to stand with a couple during one of the most important moments of their lives. It's something I take seriously, and I always want to make sure everything goes perfectly.

Which is why it's probably important that I actually have the clothes required to perform the ceremony. And wouldn't you know it? I DIDN'T HAVE MY WHITE DRESS SHIRT.

That's right. After traveling across three states, surviving multiple plumbing emergencies, narrowly escaping a museum full of elementary school children, and spending three nights investigating what may or may not be a haunted Holiday Inn, I somehow managed to arrive at the wedding day without one of the most important pieces of my wardrobe. The white shirt. You know, the thing that goes underneath the black suit and black tie. A fairly important detail.

But fortunately, Jessica and I have developed a very effective strategy for handling these kinds of emergencies. We shop.

Now, the original mission was simple. Drive to the outlet mall, find a white dress shirt, purchase said shirt, and return to the hotel. Easy enough, right? Oh, you sweet, innocent soul. Or as we say in Louisiana “Cher bébé". Apparently, you've never been shopping with Pete and Jess.

We arrived at the outlet mall with one specific objective, but somewhere between the first store and the next seventeen, our mission experienced what military strategists might call a significant expansion of operational objectives.

First, I needed a white shirt. Then we realized we could go ahead and get the outfits for our upcoming family pictures, which honestly made sense. And since we were already shopping, we might as well pick up our family's Christmas pajamas. Because nothing says October wedding weekend quite like purchasing matching Christmas pajamas.

And then there were a few other things we liked. And a few more. And apparently another twenty articles of clothing that we absolutely could not live without.

By the time we finished, what began as a simple mission to purchase one white dress shirt had turned into a full scale wardrobe renovation for the entire family. I walked into that outlet mall needing one shirt and walked out wondering whether we'd accidentally purchased enough inventory to open our own clothing boutique.

But hey, at least we were prepared for family pictures and Christmas morning. And most importantly, I now had the shirt I needed to marry these two people. Mission accomplished. Well, financially speaking, mission severely compromised.

After our shopping extravaganza, we were getting hungry. And since we were already out, we decided to make a quick stop at one of our favorite places. Buc-ee's.

Now, if you've never been to Buc-ee's, let me explain something. Buc-ee's isn't just a gas station. It's a cultural experience. Imagine someone took a convenience store, a barbecue restaurant, a gift shop, a clothing boutique, and a small amusement park, then crammed them into one building with approximately the same number of people as a sold out football stadium.

Welcome to Buc-ee's. Or, as I have heard it affectionately refer to it, COVID Central. Because if there's one place where you can experience close personal contact with every person traveling through Florida, it's the barbecue counter at Buc-ee's. But listen, there's a reason we keep going back that food!

We were craving some pulled pork and chicken tenders, and once again, Buc-ee's delivered. There's just something about grabbing a delicious sandwich, enjoying some fantastic food, and pretending you're only there for lunch.

Because we all know how this works. You walk into Buc-ee's for a sandwich. You walk out with a sandwich, a bag of snacks, some random household item you didn't know existed, and approximately fifty dollars' worth of things you had absolutely no intention of purchasing. I don't know how they do it. It's like the moment you walk through those doors, your brain completely forgets how budgets work.

But we had our food, our shopping was complete, and we still had a wedding to get ready for. So it was time to head back to our beautiful hotel.

And for those of you who have been following the ongoing paranormal investigation, yes, the parking lot was empty again.

At this point, I wasn't even surprised. Apparently, the mysterious nighttime residents had returned to whatever alternate dimension they occupy during daylight hours. Honestly, I was beginning to think the cars were checking in and out of the hotel more efficiently than the actual guests. Or maybe it’s me and it is like a "Shutter Island” thing.

But we didn't have time to investigate. We had a wedding to attend, and apparently, I was supposed to be the guy performing it.

We got dressed, made sure I actually had all the required pieces of my suit this time, and headed toward the wedding venue. And y'all, it was absolutely beautiful. The venue was gorgeous, the bride and groom looked incredible, and everything was coming together perfectly.

Now, one of the responsibilities I have as the officiant is making sure the ceremony flows smoothly. And honestly, that usually isn't too difficult because we spend time preparing for it. We have meetings, go over the order of the ceremony, discuss where everyone stands, who's walking with whom, when people move, when they stop, and all the little details that make a wedding ceremony come together.

We discuss just about everything. Except, apparently, one very important question. HOW MANY RINGS ARE IN THE RING BOX?

Let me paint you a picture. We're outside, standing on a beautiful wooden gazebo. The ceremony is going wonderfully, the bride and groom are standing there looking amazing, and we're approaching one of the most meaningful moments of the entire service: the exchange of rings.

Now, this gazebo is made of wooden boards. Wooden boards with little gaps between them. You know, the kind of gaps that small objects can fall through and disappear into the great unknown. Keep that detail in mind.

As we reach the ring exchange, I ask the best man for the rings. He hands me a ring box, which seems perfectly reasonable. Except I've already got my hands full. I've got my notes, I've got a microphone, and now I've got this ring box that needs to be opened.

So I do what any coordinated, highly trained professional would do. I attempt to juggle everything while opening the box with my left hand. And let me tell you something. I opened the box, single handedly. Oh, it opened all right. In fact, it opened with such enthusiasm that the contents decided they no longer wanted to remain inside.

Ladies and gentlemen, THE WEDDING RINGS WENT FLYING.

Not one ring. BOTH rings. The bride's ring and the groom's ring. The very symbols of their eternal love and commitment to one another were now rolling around a wooden gazebo like loose change falling out of a vending machine.

Immediately, my brain went into full emergency management mode. Because remember those little gaps between the wooden boards? Yeah. Those suddenly became the most terrifying architectural features I'd ever encountered.

There I stood, watching two wedding rings roll across the gazebo, trying to calculate whether I should attempt to stomp on them to prevent them from falling through the cracks. But then I realized that stomping on someone's brand new wedding rings during their ceremony might create an entirely different set of problems.

So I went with Plan B…Jesus take the wheel.

I don't know if you've ever experienced a moment where time seems to slow down, but let me tell you, those rings might as well have been rolling in slow motion. All I could think was, "Please stop. Please stop. PLEASE STOP." Because what exactly are you supposed to say if the wedding rings disappear through the floor in the middle of the ceremony? "Well, this is awkward." "Soooo... my bad?" "Anybody happen to have a magnet?" I had absolutely no idea.

Fortunately, by the grace of God, those beautiful little symbols of eternal love came to a stop before disappearing into the abyss beneath the gazebo. PRAISE THE LORD!

I have never been so thankful for two small pieces of jewelry to stop moving in my entire life. The rings were recovered, the ceremony continued, and I'm happy to report that the rest of the wedding went beautifully.

The couple was married, everyone was happy, and somewhere in the back of my mind, I was making a very important note for future weddings: Next time, we're discussing ring-box logistics during rehearsal. In detail. Possibly with a practice session.

Once the ceremony was over and my heart rate returned to something resembling normal, it was time to enjoy the celebration. Cocktail hour was wonderful, and one of my favorite parts was getting to meet some longtime friends of Jessica's dad.

Now, Jessica's father passed away before her and I got together, and I never had the opportunity to spend time with him. There are things about his life, his personality, and his relationship with his family that I only get to experience through the stories people share. And that's what made this time so special.

I got to listen to people who knew him, hear their stories, and learn things about him that I hadn't heard before. There's something really meaningful to me about that.

When you marry someone, you're not just joining your life with theirs. You're becoming part of their history, their family, and all the stories that helped shape who they are. And even though I never got the chance to know Jessica's dad personally, moments like these make me feel a little closer to him.

I love hearing about the people who were important in her life. I love discovering the little details about her childhood and upbringing, and I love seeing her through the eyes of people who have known her much longer than I have. Those conversations were something I'll genuinely treasure.

Of course, it wasn't long before the quiet, sentimental atmosphere of cocktail hour gave way to something entirely different. Because the reception was about to begin, and apparently, these people came ready to PARTY.

Once the doors opened and the reception got underway, it was ON. The music was fantastic, the energy was incredible, and everyone was ready to celebrate. And celebrate we did!

There was dancing, laughter, delicious food, and more stories than I could possibly fit into one blog post. Honestly, we could probably write an entire separate chapter just about the reception. And the best part was watching everybody come together to celebrate two people they love.

That's what makes weddings so special. Yes, the decorations are beautiful. Yes, everyone dresses up. Yes, the food is usually incredible. But at the heart of it all, you're surrounded by people who have come together to celebrate love, commitment, and the beginning of a new chapter.

And after nearly losing the wedding rings through a gazebo floor, I was particularly thankful that the couple actually made it to that new chapter. But while everything inside the venue was beautiful, there was one small problem . Actually, there were thousands of small problems. Well, I say small. THESE THINGS WERE PREHISTORIC.

Now, the wedding venue was situated near a river, which made for beautiful scenery and a wonderful atmosphere. Apparently, it also served as a breeding ground for mosquitoes that had somehow survived extinction.

Y'all, I don't know what they're feeding the mosquitoes in St. Augustine, but somebody needs to contact a wildlife biologist. These weren't normal mosquitoes. These were flying prehistoric creatures that looked like they should have their own exhibit at the Smithsonian. I'm pretty sure some of them were large enough to require FAA clearance before taking off.

And all I could think about was our dog, Cash. Because I genuinely believe that if Cash had been there and one of those monsters had landed on him, it would've drained every ounce of blood that poor dog had before he could even figure out what was happening. We'd have had to carry him home like an empty juice pouch.

I'm telling you, these things were enormous, and apparently, they had absolutely no respect for formal wedding attire. Fortunately, we managed to survive the mosquito invasion and return to the festivities before becoming the main course at an insect buffet.

And the party just kept going.

We arrived at the wedding around 2:45 that afternoon. By the time we finally left, it was close to 11:00 PM. Y'all, that's more than eight hours of wedding festivities, and I can honestly say there was never a dull moment.

The food was incredible, the music was fantastic, and the company made the entire evening unforgettable. We laughed until our faces hurt, heard stories we'd never heard before, celebrated with family and friends, and made memories that I know we'll talk about for years to come.

And somewhere along the way, I found myself thinking about just how much I love being married to Jessica.

There's something about attending a wedding that naturally makes you reflect on your own. You remember standing there, looking at the person you love, making promises about a future you haven't experienced yet. You remember all the excitement and anticipation, all the dreams, and all the things you hope your life together will become.

And then, a few years later, you get to look back and see how those promises have started turning into a real life together. Not a perfect life, because apparently, perfect lives don't involve broken refrigerators, cold showers, and hotel toilets that require spiritual intervention. But a beautiful life nonetheless.

And that was exactly what Jessica and I found ourselves talking about on the drive back to our hotel.

As we drove through St. Augustine that night, we started reminiscing about our own wedding. We talked about the memories from that day, the life we've built together, and the future we still have ahead of us. And honestly, these are some of my favorite conversations with my wife.

Because as much fun as we have traveling, shopping, laughing, and occasionally fleeing the scene of plumbing emergencies, there's something deeper that makes all of it so special. Life just makes sense with her.

I know that probably sounds a little cheesy, but it's true. She's my best friend, my favorite travel companion, and the person I want beside me through every season of life. We've got dreams we're still chasing, places we still want to explore, and more memories waiting to be made.

And after watching another couple begin their marriage that afternoon, I found myself incredibly thankful for the marriage God has given us.

There we were, driving through the night, talking about love and life and all the beautiful things still ahead. It was romantic, meaningful, and one of those perfect little moments where everything just feels right.

And then we turned into the Holiday Inn. THE PARKING LOT WAS FULL. AGAIN. WTH…Y'ALL. I CANNOT MAKE THIS STUFF UP.

There we were, in the middle of a beautiful, heartfelt conversation about our marriage, and suddenly I'm staring at what appears to be the annual convention of invisible hotel guests. WHERE ARE THESE PEOPLE COMING FROM?!

I looked over at Jessica, my beautiful bride, the love of my life, the woman I would follow to the ends of the earth. And I couldn't help but think, "Sweetheart, I love you more than words can express. But the next time you tell me, 'We're just here to sleep,' we're going to need to discuss the accommodations a little more thoroughly."

Because I think we're sharing this hotel with ghosts.

And That Was Day Five!

We started the morning searching for one missing white dress shirt and somehow ended up buying enough clothing to outfit the entire family for Christmas. We survived another financially irresponsible visit to Buc-ee's, returned to our mysterious hotel, and got dressed for what turned out to be an absolutely beautiful wedding.

I nearly sent the bride and groom's rings into the great unknown beneath a wooden gazebo, heard wonderful stories about Jessica's dad, and celebrated with family and friends for more than eight hours. We danced, laughed, ate incredible food, and narrowly escaped mosquitoes large enough to carry off a small family pet.

But more importantly, we spent the day celebrating love. And somewhere on that drive back to the hotel, I was reminded once again that no matter where life takes us, there's nobody I'd rather experience it with than Jessica.

She's the person I want beside me for every adventure, every celebration, every unexpected detour, and every ridiculous story we somehow manage to collect along the way. Even if our adventures occasionally involve haunted hotels.

Speaking of which, as we climbed into bed for our final night at the Holiday Inn, I was left with one burning question.

When we wake up tomorrow, will all those cars be gone AGAIN?

Because if they are, somebody needs to call Ripley's Believe It or Not. I think we've found their next exhibit.

Until our next adventure,

Pete & Jess ❤️